Education Section
The Geography of a Woman:
Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.
Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like Eritrea. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future.
After 70, they become Albania or Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.
The Geography of a Man:
Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like Zimbabwe - ruled by his under the belt and above his knees –if you know what I mean. By: Baranbas Y.
An elderly couple, both age 67, went to a sex therapist's office.
The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?"
The man said, "Will you watch us have sex?"
The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.
When the couple finished, the doctor said,
"There's nothing wrong with the way you have are making love,"
and charged them $50.
This happened several weeks in a row.
The couple would make an appointment, have sex with
no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.
Finally the doctor asked,
"Just exactly what are you trying to find out?"
The old man said, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's
married and we can't go to her house. I live with my son, and we can't
go there. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108.
We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare."
THE ART
OF KISSING...
Do you know where to Kiss ?
KISS on the hand means : FRIENDSHIP.
KISS on the nose means : YOU'RE CUTE.
KISS on the cheek means : I NEED YOU.
KISS on the neck means : I WANT YOU.
KISS on the lips means : I LOVE YOU.
KISSing with eyes closed means : I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU.
KISSing with eyes opened means : I'M WATCHING WHERE YOUR HANDS ARE GOING.
The military KISS means ..... "Keep It Simple Stupid"..
Stolen KISSes ARE THE SWEETEST! (Always want to return it)
Morale of the story is ... Its not WHO U are KISSING but WHERE you're
KISSING that matters
Other signs .....
Often thinking of you means : I CARE FOR YOU
Holding hands means : I LIKE YOU
Looking into the eyes means : DO YOU LOVE ME?
Squeezing fingertips means : I WANT A KISS
Leaning on the shoulder means : COMFORT ME
Getting occasional short hugs means : I MISS YOU
Biting lips means : I AM JEALOUS
Winking at you means : I WANT TO GO WITH YOU
Playing with your hair means: I ADORE YOU
Stepping on toes means: I HATE YOU
Getting hit in "very painful places" means : I REALLY HATE YOU
Dreaming of you at night : YOU'RE SOMEONE SPECIAL
Always being with you means : I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU
Wearing his or her ring means: YOU'RE MINE FOREVER
Often giving you something means : CARE FOR YOU VERY MUCH
This stuff was contributed courtesy of moonlight.
Hey, moonlight, thanks a million
by Helen T.
Questions, comments or suggestion on this section can be forwarded to zMusic@nitesoft.com